What would your cat say about you?

One of the best things about working in a bookshop and are there are many good things believe me, is the sheer number and variety of books I am daily surrounded by.
SH has a liberal policy toward the stock, if no customer actually dares wrestle it from your hands and if it is going back into the shop at some stage: he is quite happy for you to borrow it.
(This is one of the ways he retains staff, I have become so attached to a lot of the books acquired this way that I daren’t leave in case I have to give them back!)
My most interesting recent acquisition is a fab collection of short stories by Saki. If you have never encounter this fantastic writer I hereby gift you with a snippet of a short story called “Tobermory"
Synopsis- At a country house party a visiting professor announces to the guests that he has perfected a procedure to teach animals’ human speech. He demonstrates this on his host's cat. Soon it is clear that he omitted to teach Tobermory to be silent about certain facts…

Major Barfield plunged in heavily to effect a diversion.
"How about your carryings-on with the tortoise-shell puss up at the stables, eh?"
The moment he had said it every one realized the blunder.
"One does not usually discuss these matters in public," said Tobermory frigidly. "From a slight observation of your ways since you've been in this house I should imagine you'd find it inconvenient if I were to shift the conversation to your own little affairs."
The panic which ensued was not confined to the Major.
"Would you like to go and see if cook has got your dinner ready?" suggested Lady Blemley hurriedly, affecting to ignore the fact that it wanted at least two hours to Tobermory's dinner-time.
"Thanks," said Tobermory, "not quite so soon after my tea. I don't want to die of indigestion."
"Cats have nine lives, you know," said Sir Wilfred heartily.
"Possibly," answered Tobermory; "but only one liver."
"Adelaide!" said Mrs. Cornett, "do you mean to encourage that cat to go out and gossip about us in the servants' hall?"

See the full story at http://www.sff.net/people/DoyleMacDonald/l_tober.htm or of course better still buy it at a good book shop near you.